Memory Reconsolidation: The Mechanism Behind Deep, Lasting Change

Jen Meller
May 22
2 min read

Updated: Nov 11

“What was learned in the past can be unlearned — not forgotten, but rewritten.”— Bruce Ecker, Unlocking the Emotional Brain

At the heart of meaningful change is a quiet and remarkable process called memory reconsolidation, the brain’s natural capacity to revise old emotional learnings in light of new experience. It is how the body and mind make peace with the past, not by erasing it but by allowing a new truth to take root.

If you would like to see this process come to life, I recorded a short video where I explain what memory reconsolidating is, how it works, and why it is at the heart of so much of the change we experience thorough this work.

Rather than trying to think our way out of long-held patterns, memory reconsolidation invites us to feel our way through them. In this gentle meeting of what was and what is, something real begins to shift. The old emotional code can soften and reorganize, creating space for integration, freedom, and release.

This process lies at the heart of many experiential approaches to healing, including IFS, Somatic Experiencing, Hakomi, and attachment theory. When we bring an emotional memory into awareness within a safe and compassionate environment, and then experience something that quietly contradicts its original meaning, the brain has the opportunity to update that memory in lasting ways.

The book Unlocking the Emotional Brain describes this as “erasing emotional learnings that no longer fit current reality.” The YouTube talk Memory Reconsolidation in Action offers a glimpse of this process unfolding in real time, simple, powerful, and deeply human. These are two of the resources I often share with clients who want to understand how true change happens beneath the surface of words and insight.

Another valuable resource is the thoughtful article, written by my friend and colleague Jeff Schrum, who brings clarity and depth to this profound process. His writing illuminates both the science and the soul of memory reconsolidation and how it shapes our ongoing journey of healing, growth, and self-discovery.

Change becomes possible through the gentle reweaving of understanding and experience. Each time we return to our stories with curiosity and compassion, new pathways open for healing and growth.

Healing is not about erasing the past. It is about integrating what we have learned so we can move forward with greater ease, presence, and freedom.

If this way of working speaks to you, I would love to explore how it might support your own story and journey. You can learn more or book a session with me here.